Are Humans Programmed For Self-Destruction?
In the movie ‘Annihilation’ starring Natalie Portman there’s a discussion that has long stood out to me between Portman’s character, a biologist and ‘Dr. Ventress,’ a psychologist. Portman is asking about human nature that seems to lend toward making decisions that so clearly are harmful to the individual choosing to make the decision. The most poignant of examples being, “why would anyone ever kill themselves?” to which Ventress has a theory:
“Almost none of us commit suicide, and almost all of us self-destruct. In some way, in some part of our lives. We drink, or we smoke, we destabilize the good job... and a happy marriage. But these aren't decisions, they're... they're impulses. In fact, you're probably better equipped to explain this than I am.”
She’s asking Portman because she believes a biologist would be even better equipped to explain this than a psychologist, in other words she is postulating that human beings are genetically programmed for self-destruction. To quote Forest Whitaker from another movie, ‘The Crying Game,’ in a story along the same lines “because it’s in our nature.” And we do see it all the time around us. The predictions that humanity won’t last another 25, 50, 100 or 200 years are abundant online, although I might recommend NOT googling that. Which begs the question “are humans indeed programmed for self-destruction?”
The answer is, in fact, quite the opposite. No, we are not programmed to do so. As a factual matter, we are programmed to evolve, survive, and pass on our genes — by definition, we are programmed to not self-destruct. But it gets more complicated due to society today.
Per world renown author and speaker Dr. Gabor Mate, who was on my podcast here , we live in a society that has reached its all-time apex for suicidal ideation, depression, addiction, and just about every other psychological struggle. Modern society, with the help of a medical system that has eliminated much of the infectious diseases that kill us at a young age, has created an unintended evolutionary pitfall. We live past the ages of our teens and 20’s where we are focused on the external world. Around our 30’s, for many, per Mate, we often start to look inward. But this is new for us – we used to not make it to our 30’s. Our minds can be a troublesome place, not just for some but for all. Hence the title of my upcoming book ‘We’re All A Bit Messy.” As adults, when we look inward we do not realize this is a relatively new phenomenon. Our brains are programmed toward survival, but have not yet even found a set point for reflection. So we often find our own set point, with zero guidance or help. And that point can be dreary. Not in reality, which is important to note, but in our heads. A classic example would be “black and white thinking” — you ask someone out and they say “no” so your subconscious says “everyone will say no, I’m not lovable.” When in reality you have already been loved and many people would say “yes” to the same question. We suffer in our heads much more than we do reality.
I was recently asked on the popular podcast How I Lawyer by host Jonah Perlin why I have committed much of my time toward mental well-being and self-care. The answer is in the above. Because we need it, and because fundamentally we can overcome challenges. It is my strong belief that exactly because we are programmed for resilience and survival, that our suffering does not have to be permanent. That there is a way out that involves overcoming the tremendous array of psychological challenges we face today. This is a cause of great optimism for me, which is why I do what I do, in my own very small way, to try to help in this space. If we were programmed toward self-destruction, what would be the point? But we are not – we are programmed for harmony. I work towards this myself every single day and I've seen just how beneficial this work can be. I’ve seen how detrimental it can be when I do not. Which is why I write this blog; I hope you can join me in this work and in the belief that within us that we have control over or inner selves or, to end with the words of poet William Ernest Henley
It matters not how strait the gate
How charged with punishments the scroll,
You are the master of your fate,
You are the captain of your soul.
We are our own griefs. We are our own happinesses. We are our own remedies.
– Mike Spivey