5 Things You Can Do Every Day That Add Health and Happiness
For two weeks I have had the flu and the associated deep fatigue that goes with it. During this less than optimal stretch I’ve spent a good amount of time in bed, dreaming of the energetic days ahead when I can live fully again and where life will take me.
When I can’t do something, one small remedy I have found is to write about it — so I did just that; I made a list of things I can’t wait to do once fully recovered. The list was 5 words long; both surprisingly simple and (not coincidentally) science-backed. So while this was just my mind daydreaming, like so many things, those dreams also have been spawned by the countless books and podcasts I have listened to (and personal interviews with some of the world’s foremost researchers on well-being!) and what it means to live life. To its fullest and in the present. If you are looking for nuance, elaborate or profound thoughts, this won’t do it for you. But I think there is something to parsimony that leads us to the present, which is what I hope this list does for you.
Move. It sounds so simple, but society conspires against us. The average American takes less than 5,000 steps a day. The average hunter-gather between 10,000 and 15,000. Even with the flu I was getting 5k on many days, by force of will, and feeling my best when I was out and on the move. Almost all things healthy — sleep, diet, companionship, you name it — follow a U curve. Too little or too much (think sleep) lead to negative consequences. Not so with exercise. The more you get the better; it’s an upward cascading line. And know this — you are going to have acute illness or injuries. There will be days you can’t get out of bed. Think on that for a second, and I bet it will make you appreciate the wonders of a simple walk or hike.
Learn. Now, more than ever in human history, almost anything we can be curious about we can learn about. Want to know a cool fact? Per recent research, CQ (how curious you are) correlates with a longer, healthier life than both IQ and EQ.
Connect. Three things in life that make adults happy, per multiple studies and highlighted as living with vitality in a wonderfully powerful book by Samantha Boardman, MD ‘Everyday Vitality: Turning Stress into Strength’ meaningfully connecting with others, engaging in experiences that challenge you (this is a major theme in my upcoming book to be published in 2023) and contributing to something beyond yourself. I can vouch after being sick for two weeks that connection with others is as important as it gets. Not strangers but people we care about. I’ll call on a quote here that resonated these pasts weeks “don’t strive to please everyone. Strive to please a few people who matter.” Connect connect connect with those that matter. Treat it almost like you treat your job if you must, because why would we schedule in meetings all day but neglect spending time with those we love?
Travel. Okay so maybe you can’t travel every day, but you can get out in the world every day. Look at the happiest people you know what do they all have in common? Passion and hobbies. The more they have, the happier they seem. Or think about it like this: we are what we do, not what we think. Doing is simple, yet we seem to be in our heads more than ever and out in the world less than ever. Get out! (and do travel, travel AND see people — that’s actually my 2023 resolution).
Resist. I saved the hardest and best for last. You will become as strong as your dominant aspirations or as weak as your controlling desires. Every day I was sick I ate healthy, despite incredible temptation to just have unhealthy food delivered to me. What happened? After a few days, I craved healthy food. This phenomenon is documented beautifully in the TED Talk “The Pleasure Trap” and book of the same name. If we resist short-term urges that have zero long-term positive impact on our life, we get stronger and healthier. The best version of me is always, without exception, the version that is working on becoming better. Not in the moment, but for a lifetime. Resist simply means look to what makes you the best version of you, and discard whatever interferes with that.
I hope you embrace even one of these. It’s easy to take what we have — so much that is so simple — for granted. But living in the present is simply doing, and these 5 things you can do every day. Take my word that when you can’t do them, you pretty quickly realize how precious they really are.
– Mike Spivey
We are our own griefs. We are our own happinesses. We are our own remedies.